<!--
q = new Array();  //quotes
a = new Array();  //attributes
var nq = 0;	      //number of quotes + 1

function init_quotes() {

nq=-1;
q[++nq] = "Hard work pays off in the future - laziness pays off now."
q[++nq] = "I intend to live forever... so far, so good."
q[++nq] = "Experience is something you don't gain until just after you need it."
q[++nq] = "The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up."
q[++nq] = "Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow."
q[++nq] = "99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name (actually, a study has shown that it is only 97.3%)"
q[++nq] = "43% of all statistics are made up on the spot."
q[++nq] = "Computer systems aren't buggy -- they just develop random features."
q[++nq] = "Give me ambiguity or give me something else."
q[++nq] = "He who laughs last thinks slowest."
q[++nq] = "Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else."
q[++nq] = "Save the whales - collect the whole set."
q[++nq] = "Artificial Intelligence usually beats real stupidity."
q[++nq] = "Friends help you move... true friends help you move bodies!"
q[++nq] = "Ever notice how fast Windows runs?  Neither did I!"
q[++nq] = "Double your drive space - delete Windows."
q[++nq] = "Where there's a will, I want to be in it."
q[++nq] = "Few women admit their age... few men act theirs."
q[++nq] = "640K ought to be enough for anybody."
a[nq] = "Bill Gates, 1981"
q[++nq] = "Energizer Bunny Arrested... Charged With Battery."
q[++nq] = "While the doctors consult, the patient dies."
q[++nq] = "History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives."
a[nq] = "Abba Eban"
q[++nq] = "Consensus is what many people say in chorus but do not believe as individuals."
a[nq] = "Abba Eban"
q[++nq] = "Men don't care what's on TV.  The only care what <u>else</u> is on TV."
a[nq] = "Jerry Seinfeld"
q[++nq] = "You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"
a[nq] = "Steven Wright"
q[++nq] = "Get the facts first. You can distort them later."
a[nq] = "Mark Twain"
q[++nq] = "Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you."
a[nq] = "Elbert Hubbard"
q[++nq] = "It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats."
q[++nq] = "Happiness is getting enough sleep."
q[++nq] = "By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better."
a[nq] = "Journal of Court Reporting"
q[++nq] = "On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared."
a[nq] = "Journal of Court Reporting"
q[++nq] = "The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983."
a[nq] = "Journal of Court Reporting"
q[++nq] = "Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful."
a[nq] = "Journal of Court Reporting"
q[++nq] = "I am dying from the treatment of too many physicians."
a[nq] = "Alexander The Great"
q[++nq] = "Water, air, and cleanness are the chief articles in my pharmacy."
a[nq] = "Napoleon Bonaparte"
q[++nq] = "The whole imposing edifice of modern medicine is like the celebrated tower of Pisa -- slightly off balance."
a[nq] = "Charles, Prince of Wales"
q[++nq] = "They do certainly give very strange, and newfangled, names to diseases."
a[nq] = "Plato"
q[++nq] = "Some remedies are worse than the disease."
a[nq] = "Publilius Syrus"

++nq;
}

function show_quote() {
var i = Math.floor(Math.random() * nq);
document.qform.txt.value = q[i];
setTimeout("show_quote()", 2000);
}

function ins_quote()
{
var i = Math.floor(Math.random() * nq);

document.write("<table align='center' border='2' cellspacing='0' cellpadding='4' width='50%'>" + 
"<tr><td width='100%' bgcolor='#993300'>" +
"<font face='arial' color='#FFFFFF' size='-1'><i><b>&quot;" + q[i] + "&quot;</b></i></font>");
if (a[i] != null)
{
document.write("<p align='right'><font face='arial' color='#FFFFFF' size='0'>" + "- " + a[i] + "</p>");
}
document.write("</td></tr></table>");
}
//-->


